Why didn’t you take care of it for me?
I didn’t know you wanted any help. You didn’t ask.
I never ask for help. You should have just known.
Sorry, I’m not a mind reader.
This is an all-too-familiar scenario that plays out in personal and professional relationships quite regularly.
We’d remove a lot of angst from our daily lives and accomplish so much more if we communicated intentionally, clearly and with precision. As I wrote in a post last week, many misunderstandings and conflicts can be avoided when we slow down, think before we speak or write, and express in as few words as possible our thoughts, needs or expectations. Leave nothing to interpretation. Leave nothing unsaid. Don’t assume the other person knows what you are thinking. Control the situation by communicating precisely and with clarity. Include all of the facts and important details. Then give your instructions, crisply.
After you’ve finished speaking, you might ask politely - or firmly if the situation warrants it - if the other party understands or has any questions. In written form, at the conclusion of your message you can invite the recipients to contact you to address any uncertainty: Please don’t hesitate to call me or reply to this message immediately if you have any questions or if I can clarify anything for you.
We all dislike it when someone expects us to read his or her mind. Let’s make certain we aren’t unintentionally expecting the same of others. I promise you that the disappointments and the stress in your life will diminish and you will become a much more productive and contented individual.
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